New Age Dating Issues…..or Why I’m Glad I’m Not Single

The name of the above video is called “Black Dating in a Hip Hop Society.” I found this video while I was peeping around on Tumblr. I must say a HUGE thank you to eyedlethoughts for posting this. It truly made my day.

On to the matter at hand. While this video/cartoon was funny as hell to me, it does highlight something that is very real in the black community. Though I may be crucified for this, I am going to be VERY real in this moment. Here goes: SOME BLACK WOMEN GIVE US ALL A BAD RAP WITH THE DECISIONS THEY MAKE WHILE DATING!! *whew* It’s out there now. (Who gone check me, boo?)

So this video/cartoon starts off with a woman and her boyfriend. He is trying to take her out. After making excuses, she tells him that she is living a lie and doesn’t want to date him anymore. This is the following exchange:

Girl: I need a boss, I need a baller, I need a man like Lil’ Wayne.

Dude:Yea…I don’t have a lot of money, but I am in graduate school trying to improve my life so that I can improve yours.

She goes into great detail on how she needs and deserves Gucci bags and diamonds and how she can’t be with him because he doesn’t give her that. Towards the end of the video, the guy tells her that he is glad that he sees her true colors because he was going to propose that night and he just won the lottery. At this point, she tries to turn it around on him….telling him he must be cheating since he doesn’t want to fight her and begging him not to leave.

Today, women are always talking about how there are no good men left. In actuality, I wonder how many men think the same way. People in general, not just women, are not willing to work and grind for the things that they need. They want someone else to do the work so that they can ride their coattails. So this video makes sense to me, no matter how sad the effects. Hip hop videos give the fantasy that some rapper/singer with lots of money is gonna scoop you up from your job at MickeyDs, tell you he has money to blow and you can throw it in the bag because you can have whatever you like. There are so many of those videos out there that I believe young girls actually are waiting for somebody to “save” them and buy them lots of high end trinkets.

I, personally, want Coach bags, Louboutins, diamonds, and fast cars. Isn’t every woman’s dream to have really nice things? My goal to get these things is/was very simple:  go to college, graduate, get accepted to law school, graduate, pass the bar exam……wait til the money starts pouring in. I want to get these for myself! I don’t want to be a Twitter trending topic to get nice things (i.e., #hoesfuckingfor Louis bags). Many times great men are passed over for the dumbest things. I would take a man any day that is going to school with a good work ethic and life plan who is currently broke over a man making fast money who isn’t guaranteed to buy me the same things 6 months from now because he might be in jail. I have a lot of male friends who are actively weeding out the women who just want to benefit from their hard work. They recognize within 2 weeks when a woman wants them or just wants what they have. The ones out there trying to see how much they can get are put on the booty call list and are treated like crap…..immediately. Not going to let men totally off the hook though. There wouldn’t be nearly as many of these women out there had it not been for SOME men out there trying to buy love and pussy. Yea…..I said it.

I was always taught that you get out of ever relationship the same thing that you put into it. In the words of Lyfe Jennings, “be the person you want to find, don’t be a nickel out here looking for a dime.” (more hip hop for you…) Instead of looking for a man to come and save you, save yourself first. Get out there to make things happen for yourself and I guarantee you will soon find a man willing to shower you with everything you ever wanted……if you even still WANT a man when that happens.

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