Today marks 7 years that me and Boo Thang have been together!!! *throws confetti* *twirls around in a whimsical circle*
For the back story, this is not the day that we met, or even the day that we made things official (March 15th). This is the day that we actually stopped pretending and let each other know that we had feeling for each other that went above and beyond friends. Seven years ago today, we set up a trip to a casino buffet to try to get my good college friend back together with his college roommate (which is how we even met to begin with). Though they got back together that night, it was the beginning of the end of that relationship (they are still good friends) and the very beginning of ours. We had a LONG conversation that night about feelings and have been inseparable ever since. Even now we are together so often that his nephew started calling us Uncle JayKat like we were one person. He was about 3 then, but that name kinda stuck with his family.
We have been together through some of the hardest things that we have dealt with: the death of my mother, his stepfather, our firstborn. We’ve celebrating great triumphs: graduations, promotions, raises. THere is no other person that I would rather navigate through life with. We are calling this year a year of completion. It’s that time. Whether it’s an all out wedding or a simple justice of the peace ceremony, it’s time.
This year since our anniversary is on Sunday, we did our celebrating all weekend. We went to dinner last night at Table 100, which is a really lovely restaurant here in the city. I had the shrimp and grits and it was AWESOME!! We also went to movies to see The Lego Movie (we are big kids at heart) and brought it on in. Today is just a rest and relax day……which we cherish so much with all the hustle and bustle of the week. I love love!!
If you were like me you’ve been waiting on this show to come back since BET put that two-hour long trailer out back in July. They got showed u commercials, sucked us in and told us to wait 189 days (I didn’t have to keep track, hell Get Glue told me it had been that long) to find out what else is going to happen. Last year when the movie aired a lot of women rejoiced with cries of “this is ME” and the most often heard “finally a true representation of black women.”
Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love this show. I think it is one of the better show out there today that features black people ESPECIALLY where BET is concerned (yes, The Game….I’m talking about you!). However, this is not a correct representation of ME. That’s not my life. I know women who act just like Mary Jane, but I know far more that are nothing like her. I will watch this like I watch Scandal. I don’t plan to have an affair with the President anytime soon but Olivia Pope’s drama keeps me going because real life can be so boring. Can we not as black women just not watch TV? I don’t identify with ANYBODY on Love & Hip Hop, but it delights me, lol. [rant over] Now this show is definitely popcorn worthy but there are definitely lessons from episode one that you can apply to everyday life as a woman.
- It is not okay to absorb other people’s crazy. In the opening scene, Mary Jane breaks into her friend’s home. Apparently this friend had taken way too many pills on what we assumed to be a suicide attempt. When she gets home, her love interest (don’t worry, I’m coming back to that) tells Mary Jane that her friend needs help. Her response: She has help. Meaning Mary Jane is the help. No ma’am. That woman no matter how much you love her needs more help than you can give her. You can’t let other people’s crazy become yours. It will stress and tire you out. A good friend will be there with other solutions than just putting on a Superwoman cape. This is a lesson that I have had to learn early.
- Sex does not magically morph a situation into a relationship. Sex is one of those things that can make or break a relationship. So naturally I feel like it is very important to know where you are before you have that moment. Mary Jane finds herself all kinds of mad because her love interest found someone else to go to the concert with when she had to work late. We know from the movie that this man was a rebound from finding out the first guy was married. So because you share cookies, that means we go together? Set some boundaries and be real with yourself. You can’t set standards for someone that you aren’t following yourself. Which brings us to….
- Dating a married man is never okay. Ever. If he wasn’t honest about his marital status when you met and you found out later, RUN. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Leave it alone. Immediately. Don’t go back to it. No matter what he says about how he feels about his wife, you are 9 times out of 10 setting yourself up for failure. And it’s adultery!!
- You have nothing to gain by busting up someone else’s relationship when you find out that you are indeed the other woman. Ask yourself one question: do you really want to inform her that her man is foul or do you want her to be just as miserable as you?
I wonder what I will learn next week!! Do you watch Being Mary Jane? Did you love it?
I know that my posting hasn’t been worth ish. Access to internet is limited and to be perfectly honest…..sometimes after working on a computer for 8+ hours a day, I really don’t feel like getting on one at home. But I am back and will be posting more regularly. So on to the announcement…..
I am 12 weeks pregnant!!!! It was a shock to both Jay and I, but why it was such a shock is beyond me lol. I’ve been off birth control for health reasons since October 2011. The rhythm method was working so well that I think we forgot that that mess wasn’t foolproof. So I’m going to be a mommy! My first thought was “Noooo…..I’m too young!!!” Then I realized that I am going to turn 29 in August. I’m really running out of time to have pregnancies that aren’t high risk ones. When I saw that positive Clear Blue Easy, I really just panicked. No other way to say it. I always try to schedule things where they go into their perfect place. Kids was supposed to come only after the career get on track and most importantly after marriage. Welp! Change in plans. Every day that passes, the more excited I become about bringing life into the world. The great part about it is that I have a loving partner that will be there every step of the way! So let’s have a drink to me (well y’all drink and I’ll watch). This blog will turn into a journal of my pregnancy with posts, rants, random commentary and pictures throughout the way!!
1. I know I haven’t blogged in a LONG time! Still trying to get adjusted to working 8 hours and having a life after I clock out. It’s the struggle. All That time being unemployed has greatly put me at a disadvantage. Did I say that the pay is absolutely friggin awesome?!?! I’ve never made this much money in one pay period in my entire life! I’m not even getting commision yet! I can also see how a person would get stuck there…..gotta make sure I remember what I’m here for.
2. If I’ve said it before, I’ve said it a million times…..I’M READY TO MOVE! Looking at my take home, we’re set to go by the end of next month.
3. Relationships are ahrd….ESPECIALLY when you’ve been together for a long time. Communication seems to be a struggle. People get too comfortable. Troubled times have shown me that there is no one else that I’d rather go though this stuff with than Boo Thang. (Even though I’m sure we’d like to strangle each other sometimes!)
4. One day Daddy is in love with his wife, the next day I’m supposed to draw up his divorce papers (this is another post in itself). I’ve decided that I no longer want to be involved or kept abreast of the foolishness….because that is exactly what it is. Some folks need to grow the hell up.
February 9th marked me and Boo Thang’s 5th anniversary. WOW! It doesn’t even seem like it’s been that long at all. I guess they say time flies when you are having fun. We have had our share of ups and downs, but we are still going strong.
We spent this whole weekend holed up at the Marriott (thank God for employee perks!) just enjoying each other’s company, staying warm, being BY OURSELVES, and catching up on much needed rest. Sometimes I think I am making him old. We even stayed up all night jamming to Whitney Houston songs (that is a whole other post). I surprised him with a romantic setup that almost made him cry. That means the world to me.
I can’t wait for the rest of our story to unfold. I’m still excited when I see him. He still gives me goosebumps when we kiss. I love him. I truly do.
My Latest Greatest Inspiration – Teddy Pendergrass
I know this sounds very “The Wood” of me to want this song played at my wedding, lol. The first time that I ever remember hearing this song was when I heard first saw this movie. However, this song has special meaning for me and Boo Thang. This song was playing while we were expressing the deepest of our real feelings for each other for the very first time. It was the moment that we decided to look at our own happiness and let our respective toxic relationships go and get together. Every time I hear it, I smile.
Triangles by Ellen Hopkins
My rating: 4 of 5 stars
Triangles is my very first book of 2012. Although I started reading this book in December’s, the majority was read after the new year.
This book was an interesting read for the mere fact that it was written totally in prose. I loved to see how the poems from one character wives themselves and intermingled with the poems of another character.
This book centers around 3 women in their forties, heading toward a midlife crisis. Holly is a housewife with 3 loving kids and a husband who loves her. However, she is seriously bored with her life. This boredom added to a dramatic weight loss leads to get seeking happiness outside the relationship. Andrea is Holly’s best friend. She is a lonely single mother, who can’t get on board with Holly’s new lifestyle and ponders taking Holly’s neglected husband off her hands. Marissa, Andrea’s sister, is also a housewife with a distant, alcoholic husband, a homosexual son, and a terminally ill daughter that leaves her asking many questions of her life. This book has plenty of spicy, erotic scenes for those who are into that and other heartfelt moments.
I originally rated this book 5 stars when I first finished. Just thinking about the book a few days later, I have to drop it down to 4 stars. What I didn’t like about the book was the fact that it was so ling (529 pages) and after all that the book ended with no real solutions or conclusions for the characters. Still a very good read in my opinion.
View all my reviews
Talking In His Sleep – Toni Braxton
If I had a favorite album of all time, I would have to say it was Toni Braxton’s Secrets. I dub this album my favorite because no matter how old I am, I can pop this CD in and jam out like it was…..well 1996 when it came out lol. It is hard to believe that I was 13 when this CD came out. THIS ALBUM IS 15 YEARS OLD!!! How can you not love it? Unbreak My Heart, How Could An Angel Break My Heart…..magic!!!
4 AM – Melanie Fiona
This song plays A LOT. I’m glad she is getting a lot of radio play because I love her as an artist but I don’t think that she gets the recognition that she deserves. At all. When is the next single coming out? I would hate to put her in the Kelly Rowland category….
Cool – Anthony Hamilton
This song has to be the theme and anthem of me and Boo Thang’s relationship. When I hear this song I instantly start to smile. There was a time where we took a trip with two other couples to Gatlinburg. The other two girlfriends got into a fist fight and were bickering the whole time we were there. THREE. DAYS. WORTH. OF. BICKERING. It almost put a damper on our vacation (that we saved months for, might I add…), but we heard this song and everything was alright with the world. Anytime outside forces come in to damage our collective psyche, we just play this song and keep it moving. I love him.