Today marks 7 years that me and Boo Thang have been together!!! *throws confetti* *twirls around in a whimsical circle*
For the back story, this is not the day that we met, or even the day that we made things official (March 15th). This is the day that we actually stopped pretending and let each other know that we had feeling for each other that went above and beyond friends. Seven years ago today, we set up a trip to a casino buffet to try to get my good college friend back together with his college roommate (which is how we even met to begin with). Though they got back together that night, it was the beginning of the end of that relationship (they are still good friends) and the very beginning of ours. We had a LONG conversation that night about feelings and have been inseparable ever since. Even now we are together so often that his nephew started calling us Uncle JayKat like we were one person. He was about 3 then, but that name kinda stuck with his family.
We have been together through some of the hardest things that we have dealt with: the death of my mother, his stepfather, our firstborn. We’ve celebrating great triumphs: graduations, promotions, raises. THere is no other person that I would rather navigate through life with. We are calling this year a year of completion. It’s that time. Whether it’s an all out wedding or a simple justice of the peace ceremony, it’s time.
This year since our anniversary is on Sunday, we did our celebrating all weekend. We went to dinner last night at Table 100, which is a really lovely restaurant here in the city. I had the shrimp and grits and it was AWESOME!! We also went to movies to see The Lego Movie (we are big kids at heart) and brought it on in. Today is just a rest and relax day……which we cherish so much with all the hustle and bustle of the week. I love love!!
If you were like me you’ve been waiting on this show to come back since BET put that two-hour long trailer out back in July. They got showed u commercials, sucked us in and told us to wait 189 days (I didn’t have to keep track, hell Get Glue told me it had been that long) to find out what else is going to happen. Last year when the movie aired a lot of women rejoiced with cries of “this is ME” and the most often heard “finally a true representation of black women.”
Don’t get me wrong. I absolutely love this show. I think it is one of the better show out there today that features black people ESPECIALLY where BET is concerned (yes, The Game….I’m talking about you!). However, this is not a correct representation of ME. That’s not my life. I know women who act just like Mary Jane, but I know far more that are nothing like her. I will watch this like I watch Scandal. I don’t plan to have an affair with the President anytime soon but Olivia Pope’s drama keeps me going because real life can be so boring. Can we not as black women just not watch TV? I don’t identify with ANYBODY on Love & Hip Hop, but it delights me, lol. [rant over] Now this show is definitely popcorn worthy but there are definitely lessons from episode one that you can apply to everyday life as a woman.
- It is not okay to absorb other people’s crazy. In the opening scene, Mary Jane breaks into her friend’s home. Apparently this friend had taken way too many pills on what we assumed to be a suicide attempt. When she gets home, her love interest (don’t worry, I’m coming back to that) tells Mary Jane that her friend needs help. Her response: She has help. Meaning Mary Jane is the help. No ma’am. That woman no matter how much you love her needs more help than you can give her. You can’t let other people’s crazy become yours. It will stress and tire you out. A good friend will be there with other solutions than just putting on a Superwoman cape. This is a lesson that I have had to learn early.
- Sex does not magically morph a situation into a relationship. Sex is one of those things that can make or break a relationship. So naturally I feel like it is very important to know where you are before you have that moment. Mary Jane finds herself all kinds of mad because her love interest found someone else to go to the concert with when she had to work late. We know from the movie that this man was a rebound from finding out the first guy was married. So because you share cookies, that means we go together? Set some boundaries and be real with yourself. You can’t set standards for someone that you aren’t following yourself. Which brings us to….
- Dating a married man is never okay. Ever. If he wasn’t honest about his marital status when you met and you found out later, RUN. Do not pass go, do not collect $200. Leave it alone. Immediately. Don’t go back to it. No matter what he says about how he feels about his wife, you are 9 times out of 10 setting yourself up for failure. And it’s adultery!!
- You have nothing to gain by busting up someone else’s relationship when you find out that you are indeed the other woman. Ask yourself one question: do you really want to inform her that her man is foul or do you want her to be just as miserable as you?
I wonder what I will learn next week!! Do you watch Being Mary Jane? Did you love it?
Today I am linking up with Michelle from Divas With A Purpose on Thankful Thursday. At a time where I find SO many things to complain about I guess I do need to sit down and think about the things that I am truly grateful for and the things I am blessed to have.
- I am thankful for my eye surgery. Not only did I need to get that detached retina fixed, this afforded me a 2 week FMLA break from my job….which was well needed because I was feeling stuck.
- I am thankful for having such an understanding and caring boyfriend. I give thanks for him a lot because he’s my best friend. I really don’t know what I would do without him.
- I am thankful for this job, because even though I am not that fond of it right now, it allows me to do things that I haven’t been able to in a long while.
- I am thankful for family. We don’t always see eye to eye, but I love the fact that I can count on them at a moment’s notice.
What are you guys thankful for?
I know that my posting hasn’t been worth ish. Access to internet is limited and to be perfectly honest…..sometimes after working on a computer for 8+ hours a day, I really don’t feel like getting on one at home. But I am back and will be posting more regularly. So on to the announcement…..
I am 12 weeks pregnant!!!! It was a shock to both Jay and I, but why it was such a shock is beyond me lol. I’ve been off birth control for health reasons since October 2011. The rhythm method was working so well that I think we forgot that that mess wasn’t foolproof. So I’m going to be a mommy! My first thought was “Noooo…..I’m too young!!!” Then I realized that I am going to turn 29 in August. I’m really running out of time to have pregnancies that aren’t high risk ones. When I saw that positive Clear Blue Easy, I really just panicked. No other way to say it. I always try to schedule things where they go into their perfect place. Kids was supposed to come only after the career get on track and most importantly after marriage. Welp! Change in plans. Every day that passes, the more excited I become about bringing life into the world. The great part about it is that I have a loving partner that will be there every step of the way! So let’s have a drink to me (well y’all drink and I’ll watch). This blog will turn into a journal of my pregnancy with posts, rants, random commentary and pictures throughout the way!!
This song was EVERYTHING this time last year. It never got old for some reason. In fact, I’m listening to it right now and getting that old feeling back!! I LOVE CHRIS BROWN!!
So that concludes my 30 day music challenge and I actually finished one!!! So proud of myself. How are you guys doing on your reading challenges? I’ve been paying attention….I know some of you are behind lol.
Take Me (I’m Yours) – Johnny Gill
This is one of those “baby, baby, please…I’ve done wrong, I’m sorry” songs. The emotion in it just makes me cry when I hear it. Johnny meant that shit!! This song definitely lets me stay inside my feelings.
Garden Of Love – Raheem DeVaughn
If I need music to soothe me to sleep, a Raheem DeVaughn album is definitely the way to go. Something about this song is so soothing to me that I fall asleep before the song is over. It is sensual and sexual. So if I use at other special times….I’m still poised to go to bed extra happy!